Dark Matter STRIKES: Yet another do-over, Part 4

Kirby slept rather comfortably after the cricket was gone.

In the morning, the sun shone on Kirby’s eyes, which caused him to wake up. Kirby shot his eyes open and panicked.

Kirby: AHH! IT’S THE APOCALYPSE! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!

It was just then he realized that the “apocalypse” was just the sun shining in the sky.

Kirby: Oh…um…whoops! *laughs nervously*

Kirby continued on his walk to find information on where he was. He came face to face with a tiger. The tiger roared in his face.

Kirby: Oh boy…breakfast!

The tiger gazed at Kirby in confusion which slowly turned into a gaze of horror as Kirby started to open his mouth and use his vac…vaccum…ARGH whatever it’s called ability and sucked the tiger in. The tiger was nowhere to be seen as Kirby swallowed it in one gulp.

Kirby: That was filling!

After more walking, Kirby came across a sign by a bridge. Kirby read the sign.

Kirby: “Town across bridge.” Oh joy! CIVILIZATION! Maybe I *starts walking toward the bridge* can finally find what I’ve be- OH WHAT IS THIS?! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!

The aforementioned bridge disappeared on him and Kirby started falling rather quickly down a cliff. He started to scream his lungs out.

Kirby: NOOOO I’M GONNA DIE!! STUPID MIRAGES!

Then something occurred to Kirby.

Kirby: Wait a minute, I can fly for a little while by breathing up air!

Kirby sucked in the air in his area and became twice his normal size. He managed to have enough time to fly to the other side of the bridge.

Kirby: That was too close! Now, where shall I go next?

Kirby continued on the road that was clearly laid out for travelers to find the town it lead to. He managed to come across a man. This man had crystal-blue eyes, blonde gold hair, and elven ears. Kirby thought his manner of dress was really weird. He was wearing what resembled to be a green dress of sorts with a belt across the waist, silver tights, a floppy green hat, and leather gloves. Not knowing the important of manners, Kirby walked up to him and:

Kirby: Hey, do you have a cross-dressing fetish?

The man got mad and lashed out at Kirby.

Man: HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE ME OF SUCH VULGAR PASTIMES! THIS IS A TUNIC FOR GUYS! I’M SO SORRY THAT YOU THINK THIS IS A DRESS!

Kirby backed away a little.

Kirby: Sorry.

The man managed to cool down.

Man: It’s OK. Sorry for taking it out on you. I get this question a lot and I just lost it when you asked me it. Stupid Hyrulean wear. My name is Link, and I come from the land of Hyrule on a vacation. What is your name, pink bally?

Link took out his sword to pose and try to look cool. He didn’t realize that the force from pulling out his sword cut down a tree right next to him. All he had to say was “Whoops.”

Kirby nodded and stood on tiptoe to shake his hand (…flabby arm…whatever) with Link.

Kirby: Hello Link. My name is Kirby.

Kirby attempted a pose of his own. However, in the middle of the pose, the tree fell down and crushed Kirby.

Link: Kirby! Sorry about that! Are you OK?

Kirby: MPPHMPHOWMPPPH! (OW, THAT HURTS!)

Link ran up to the tree and attempted to cut it off Kirby. It worked, only…

Kirby: LINK YOU NEARLY CUT MY ARM OFF!

Link: Sorry, sorry! But you’re out right?

Kirby: Yeah. Thanks. *attempts to shake off the pain from the impact of the tree*

Link: What brings you to these parts…Kirby?

Kirby: Well. I’ll give you the short version of my story. I am from another planet. I do not want to be here. I have been shot off by a nemesis of mines. I really need to find a way to get back to my planet and save it from him again.

Kirby was wondering if Link would believe him. His statement may sound very outlandish to someone from a different land. Link just nodded.

Link: So you’re an alien then?

Kirby: Basically. But we’re able to speak English and communicate with most life forms from other planets.

Link: That is awesome. Hey, do you mind if I help you out on your journey?

Kirby: Are you sure?

Link: It’s been two years since I saved Hyrule. NOTHING is happening these days. I need some excitement in my life. Do you mind?

Kirby: Of course not! You’re allowed to help me. I need all the help I can get this time. My nemesis is stronger than the last time I fought him.

Link: I hope we’ll become great companions and get you back home safely.

Kirby thanked Link greatly, and so they set off on their grand journey.Original chapter